Social Cues?

It’s hard to understand not really knowing that you are being bullied. Most people get it, when someone is mean to you, you should probably leave them alone. When children have social disorders it’s harder for them to read the cues that another person gives, harder to understand when they’re being bullied. This is something that Carter’s parents struggle with, because they hear about him getting bullied and him not doing anything about it. There is a boy in Carter’s class that likes to tease him, however he doesn’t always understand that the teasing is intentional. So either he goes along with it or later forgives the person that was doing the teasing. His parents ask him, “Why would you play with him on the playground again if he is always so mean to you?!” and Carter always answers, “Because he’s my friend.” It’s hard for him to think that someone doesn’t like him, or even more- would intentionally say things to hurt him.

Can you imagine having to be trained to deal with bullies? Taught word for word what to say in social situations? Social training happens often for children with autism. Since they cannot judge social situations, they have to be taught how to react, how to read people.

"Parents and teachers should take heed and not be offended if a child with Asperger's does not respond when first spoken to.  They should make sure the child is tuned in, and then allow them a chance to process a question given and be able to formulate an answer.  Although it may take an extra few seconds, it is important that they are not interrupted or asked the question again. "

This comes from this blog, http://www.examiner.com/article/interactions-and-asperger-s-helping-your-child-respond-social-situations, about a mother with a son who has Aspergers. She highlights very well some of reasons that children may have trouble communicating.